In her book the Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, Amy Chua describes the Chinese parenting as revolving around total respect for parents, heavy on math and language drills and hours of music lessons (piano or violin). Children are given very few choices and lots of verbal abuse when they “screw up.” Chua thinks that Western approaches to parenting are overly concerned with a child’s self -esteem. She raised 2 daughters with this method. One did well, the other rebelled at age 13. In the end, Chua had to moderate her approach with more freedom and more choices.
There is no one size fits all parenting style. But we do know that all children need encouragement, love and opportunities to excel. Self-esteem is important. It comes not just from how we achieve but hopefully from people who love us for who we are.